60 Humorous Viagra Jokes And Puns That By no means Get Outdated

Viagra, scientifically generally known as sildenafil, stormed the market within the late Nineteen Nineties and adjusted the sport for numerous people. It’s somewhat blue tablet with mighty powers, meant to deal with erectile dysfunction and make sure that the flag stays flying at full mast should you catch my drift. As a groundbreaking resolution to a delicate difficulty, Viagra turned a cultural phenomenon, turning bed room whispers into daring, empowered conversations at dinner tables and pharmacy counters.

Naturally, the place there’s a popular culture staple, there are jokes to be cracked, and Viagra, regardless of its stiff topic, isn’t any exception. Viagra jokes have develop into the lifetime of many events, given the tablet’s simple presence in our lives. Have you ever heard concerning the man who took Viagra and a sleeping tablet on the similar time? He didn’t know if he was coming or going! Or what concerning the one the place Viagra is now obtainable in powder kind to place in your tea? It doesn’t improve efficiency, however it prevents your biscuit from going mushy! These puns spotlight society’s means to search out humor in absolutely anything, giving a lighthearted spin to a subject which may in any other case rise to awkwardness.

Finest Viagra Jokes

Did you hear concerning the man who takes Viagra for his sunburn?
It doesn’t treatment it, however it retains the sheets off his legs when he sleeps.

What’s the medical title for Viagra?

Two males broke right into a drugstore and stole all of the Viagra.
The police put out an alert to be looking out for the 2 hardened criminals.

Have you ever ever overdosed on Viagra?
It is going to be the toughest day of your life.

Yo mama so ugly, her dildo wants Viagra.

Do you know that more cash is spent on boob jobs and Viagra than on Alzheimer’s analysis? By 2040 the aged could have perky tits, stiff cocks, and no fucking concept why!

What occurs if you mix some Viagra with penis enlarging capsules and dissolve them in some eye drops?
It makes you’re taking a protracted, arduous take a look at your self.

A girl walked Right into a pharmacy and spoke with the pharmacist
She asks the pharmacist if he has Viagra. “I certain do” he responds. “Does it truly work?”. “After all it does.” He responds. “Are you able to get it over-the-counter?” She asks.
“I can if I take two.”

Did you hear that Grandpa just lately needed to begin utilizing Viagra?
Grandma took it fairly arduous.

Viagra was banned in China by the federal government.
They don’t need to admit they’ve election issues.

Why is Viagra a gateway drug?
It results in tougher issues.

Somewhat boy has diarrhea and tells his mother he wants Viagra.
Mother replies, “What the hell for?”
The boy replies, “Isn’t that what you give dad when his shit doesn’t get arduous?”

A husband and spouse agreed that the husband has some erectile dysfunction points.
Their approaches, nonetheless, are completely different. She purchased him a pack of Viagra. He purchased her a fitness center membership.

Really helpful: Erectile Dysfunction Jokes

Why was the crocodile taking Viagra?
He was affected by eREPTILE disfunction.

Do you need to know what occurs if you give a politician Viagra?
He will get taller.

The makers of Viagra have introduced that they’ve developed a tablet to extend the wetness in girls.
They’re calling it Niagra.

A man tried to treatment his despair with Viagra.
It didn’t work. Issues had been getting tougher and tougher.

A person is visiting his aged father in a care house.
The person asks how his father is settling in.
“Oh, it’s great son, I’ve made some nice associates, I’m properly rested and at night time the nurses give us a sizzling chocolate and a Viagra earlier than mattress each night time”.
When leaving, curious to find out about Viagra, he asks a nurse.
“Excuse me, my dad informed me that you just serve him sizzling chocolate and Viagra earlier than mattress each night time, why?”
The nurse replies, “Oh, the recent chocolate is to assist them go to sleep.”
“And the Viagra is to cease them rolling off the bed!”

What occurs if an individual overdoses on Viagra?
They ‘die arduous.’

Are you aware what the generic title for Viagra is?

What firm goes to begin promoting capsules which are the other of Viagra?

Viagra now is available in a nasal spray.
It’s for dick heads.

Really helpful: Dick Jokes

A girl goes to the physician for assist along with her intercourse life.
Physician: Give your husband Viagra.
Woman: I can’t, he hates capsules.
Physician: Simply put it in his espresso.
Subsequent week she returns, sad.
Physician: Was it good?
Woman: It was the worst intercourse I ever had. He had just a few sips of espresso, then he pushed every little thing off the desk and fucked me on it proper then and there.
Physician: Nicely, then what’s unsuitable?
Woman: I’ll by no means have the ability to present my face at Starbucks once more.

Did you hear concerning the man who died from a Viagra overdose?
They couldn’t shut his coffin.

Why is Viagra like Disneyland?
You wait an hour for a two-minute experience.

An 85-year-old man, who has been a single widower for 30 years, will get engaged to a 27-year-old woman.
He goes to his physician for a Viagra prescription in preparation for his wedding ceremony night time.
The physician tells him, ” I have to warn you that given the size of time that you’ve been abstinent and the efficiency of this drug, intercourse may show to be deadly.”
The outdated man says, “Doc, if she dies, she dies.”

What do you name a field of Viagra capsules?
An growth pack.

Why Viagra workers are so disciplined?
They work actually arduous.

A person went to the dental surgeon to have a tooth pulled The dentist pulled out the novocaine freezing needle to inject the person. “No manner! No needles! I hate needles!” the affected person stated.
The dentist begins to hook up the laughing gasoline and the person once more objects.
“I can’t do the gasoline factor – the considered having the gasoline masks on is suffocating to me!”
The dentist then asks if the person has any objection to taking a tablet.
“No,” the affected person says, “I’m nice with capsules.”
The dentist then returns and says, “Here’s a Viagra pill.”
The affected person says, “Wow – I didn’t know Viagra labored as a ache tablet.!”
“It doesn’t,” stated the dentist and continued:
“Nevertheless it provides you with one thing to carry onto after I pull out your tooth.”

Why shouldn’t you utilize Viagra should you’re additionally taking an iron complement?
You’ll spend a number of hours dealing with north.

Why does the US army spend $41m on Viagra?
Rain or shine, chilly or sizzling, it’s one of the best ways to get their privates to face at consideration for greater than 4 hours.

A parrot swallows a Viagra pill.
His proprietor, disgusted, places him within the freezer to chill off. Later when he opens the freezer, he finds the parrot sweating. “How come you might be sweating?” he asks. The parrot replies, “Are you aware how arduous it’s to open the legs of a frozen hen?”

What’s the distinction between Niagara and Viagra?
Niagara falls.

What are the 2 most important elements in Viagra?
Miracle develop and repair a flat.

A person walked into his physician’s workplace and requested him for 3 Viagra capsules.
The physician requested, “Why solely 3?”
The person stated, “Nicely, Friday my secretary is coming over, Saturday my girlfriend is coming over, and Sunday, my spouse is coming house from her trip.”
The physician stated, “That’s greater than I needed to know, however right here’s your 3 capsules.”
Every week later the physician noticed the person on the gasoline station, his arm in a forged and sling.
“What occurred to you? Did the ladies all discover out about each other?” the physician requested.
The person stated, “No… no one confirmed up!”

What do you name a man who snorts Viagra?
Fuck Nostril.

What do you name low-cost deer Viagra?
A bang to your buck.

Grandpa snoops into the drugs cupboard the place he finds a bottle of Viagra within the lavatory drugs cupboard, he asks his son about utilizing one of many capsules.
The son stated, “I don’t assume it’s best to take one Dad; they’re very robust and really costly.” “How a lot?” requested Grandpa. “$10. a tablet,” answered the son. “I don’t care,” stated Grandpa, “I’d nonetheless wish to strive one, and earlier than we go away within the morning, I’ll put the cash underneath the pillow.”
Later the subsequent morning, the son discovered $110 underneath the pillow. He known as Grandpa and stated, “I informed you every tablet was $10, not $110. “I do know,” stated Grandpa. “The hundred is from Grandma!”

What do you name it when a carpenter takes Viagra?
Wooden working.

After a Viagra salesman died from the consequences of the drug, the corporate gifted his household a casket of a brand new, high-end materials.
They name it mourning wooden.

A person goes to the pharmacist and asks for 3 1/2 Viagra capsules.
The pharmacist is confused and asks, “Why 3 1/2?”
The person responds, “Nicely, on Monday I’m going to see my mistress and I want two. I want one for Wednesday with my spouse. And on Friday, I’m going to the sauna and it simply must look presentable.”

Why do band members take Viagra earlier than a present?
To make them rock arduous for a very long time!

What did the person say after by accident taking Viagra as a substitute of his sleeping capsules?
“Now I’ll be up all night time.”

An outdated man walks right into a chemist and begins inspecting packs of Viagra.
The Nurse asks, “Do you want any assist there, sir?”
The outdated man says, “Sure, each Saturday my spouse desires to have intercourse, however sadly, I can by no means get an erection. Which model of Viagra would you suggest?”
The nurse says, “Nicely sir, everyone seems to be completely different, however should you include me to the counter, I can get you a pack that’s proving highly regarded with our clients.”
The outdated man follows the nurse to the counter, she turns round, bends over, and picks up the Viagra from the underside shelf, as she turns again round, the outdated man is already strolling away.
Whereas strolling away, the outdated man says, “Thanks very a lot, I’ll see you once more subsequent Saturday.

Do you know Viagra is a vitamin?
It helps construct robust bones.

Why must you keep away from individuals who’ve had issues with Viagra?
They’re caught up.

A husband dies after consuming spaghetti.
The physician says, “It seems that your husband died from a pierced stomach.”
The Spouse says, “How is it potential? All he had was spaghetti.”
The physician says, “After consuming spaghetti, he took some Viagra. what that does to limp noodles.”

Have you ever heard concerning the new Viagra biscuits?
They by no means go mushy.

Why couldn’t they attain a verdict within the Viagra fraud trial?
It was a hung jury.

A married lady walks as much as Santa Claus and tells him that every one she desires for Christmas is for her husband to be serious about intercourse.
Santa then proceeds to provide her a bottle of capsules. He tells her to provide them a strive after which let him know the way it’s working.
So she takes the capsules house and places one tablet in her husband’s Christmas dinner. That night time, they make love for one hour. The subsequent day, she’s working round thrilled and comfortable.
“Oh, my God. I can’t imagine how properly that labored,” she thinks to herself. That night time she places two capsules in his meals and that night time they make love for 2 hours. The subsequent day, she’s much more thrilled, so she dumps all of the capsules in his meals.
Two weeks go by with none phrase from this lady, so Santa decides to provide her a name. Somewhat boy solutions the cellphone. Santa says, “Little boy, is your mom house?”
“No, she’s…who’s this?” the little boy asks. “I’m a buddy of your mom’s and I gave her some capsules to assist her out a few weeks in the past. Perhaps you understand how it’s going?”
“That was you?!” the little boy says. “Let me inform you — Mother’s lifeless, sister’s pregnant, my ass hurts and Dad’s within the attic going, ‘Right here kitty, kitty, kitty.’ “

What do you name Viagra for Pokemon?

Did you hear they’re rebranding Viagra?
It’s now being known as “The Necromancer.”

A girl calls 911 and paramedics rush her unconscious husband to the hospital She limps into the ER because the nurses wheel him in on a stretcher, his monumental erection clearly seen underneath the sheet. The physician runs some assessments and says to her “Ma’am, it seems your husband overdosed on Viagra and is in a coma. How lengthy has he been like this?”
“About 4 days,” she replies.
“4 days?! Why did you wait till now to get assist?”
“I ran out of lube this morning!”

What do the iPhone 14 and Viagra have in widespread?
They’re each $800 for an additional inch!

How is youngster help and Viagra the identical?
They each make it arduous for you.

An aged gentleman went to the native drugstore and requested the pharmacist to fill his prescription for Viagra.
“What number of would you like?” requested the pharmacist.
The person replied, “Only a few, perhaps half a dozen. I lower each into 4 items.” Upon listening to that, the pharmacist stated, “That’s too small a dose. That gained’t get you thru intercourse.”
The outdated fellow stated, “Oh, I’m previous ninety years outdated and I don’t even take into consideration that anymore. I simply need it to stay out sufficient so I don’t pee on my footwear.”

What does a person do after consuming solely half a tablet of Viagra?
Nothing… simply fucking round a bit.

Have you ever heard concerning the Viagra laptop virus?
It turns your 3 1/2 inch floppy into a tough disk.

A person walks right into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist, “Hear, I’ve three women coming over tonight. I’ve by no means had three women directly, and I want one thing to maintain me sexy.. maintain potent.” The pharmacist reaches underneath the counter, unlocks the underside drawer and takes out a small cardboard field marked with the label “Viagra Further Power” and says, “Right here, should you eat this, you’ll go NUTS for 12 hours!”
The person says, “Gimme 3 containers.” The subsequent day, he walks into the identical pharmacy, proper as much as the identical pharmacist, and pulls down his pants.
The pharmacist appears in horror as he notices the person’s penis is black and blue, and the pores and skin is hanging off in some locations. The person says, “Gimme a bottle of Ben Homosexual.”
The pharmacist replies, “BEN GAY?!?!?! You’re not going to place Ben Homosexual on THAT, are you?” The person says, “Naw, it’s for my arms. The ladies didn’t present up!!”

Did you hear concerning the Viagra Olympics?
The competitors is stiff.

What do you get if you cross Viagra and Donald Trump?
Erection Fraud.

Do you may have a humorous Viagra joke? Write down your individual Viagra puns within the remark part beneath!

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