The Funniest Posts From Childfree Reddit Group

Childfree Reddit is a web-based neighborhood that brings collectively individuals who have intentionally chosen to not have youngsters and usually are not afraid to listing all of the humorous causes behind their determination. One of many Childfree neighborhood members even opened a Childfree retailer on Etsy to make a enterprise out of their collective dislike of the thought of getting youngsters. You will get all types of merch there. In any case… Scroll down to take a look at the funniest causes of by no means turning into a father or mother!

my fiancé and I started a baby jar & every time someone asks when we’re going to have kids we put a dollar in & when the jar is full we will spend it on whatever we want bc we don’t have kids

A guy my age was telling me how happy he was that his wife just gave birth to their fourth child then was like “sorry, don’t mean to brag” and it’s like, oh no worries, your life literally sounds terrible to me

I’ve noticed women who look really great for their age follow a strict skincare regimen of never having children.

I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life but the fact that I’ve never been invited to a gender reveal party means I’ve cut the right people out.

Everyone who told me that I would change my mind about having kids is now telling me how lucky I am not to have kids.

Mom holding crying baby: He just needs to be changed. Me: Yeah hopefully into a puppy or something quieter.

Having kids is a never-ending nightmare. Use protection! End the cycle of misery!

My neighbors have both a howling dog and a screaming baby out in their yard. I'd throw a rock or something but I'm afraid I'd hit the dog.

Family: Why would you get tattoos? They’re expensive and painful to get and they are PERMANENT! Also family: Have a baby :)

Our family

When people ask if I want to hold their baby

if you say "I don't want kids" three times a middle aged person will appear and explain you might change your mind

I hate this pandemic, if I wanted to waste my early 30s I would have gotten married and had kids.

Let’s get married and have kids so instead of a lazy Saturday morning we can panic because a sports uniform didn’t get put in the dryer.

People say " You're 40 now. You should be settling down and having kids. " Well I'm busy at the moment making sure my dogs taco costume is ready for Halloween.

HER: Do you want to have kids?
ME: No
HER: Why not?
ME: I couldn't take all the crying
HER: They don't cry all the time
ME: No, I meant me


A: When are you having kids?
B: I’m not. I really don’t want to be a parent.
A: Oh, no! I hope you get pregnant. Accidents happen. *wink*
A: I can’t wait to get pregnant. It’s all I’ve ever wanted.
B: Oh, I hope you can’t! Infertility happens, you know. *wink* Hee hee!

Telling people “I don’t want kids”:
-“You’ll change your mind one day”
-“When you meet the right person...”
-“You don’t understand, you’re not a parent”

Telling people “My bloodline ends with me”
-Your bloodline feels sacred and mystical
-Vaguely threatening

Biggest scam ever: apartments charging pet fees but not children fees. My cat lays on the couch all day while I can hear children literally beating on the walls.

Boomer: "Having kids is the hardest most exhausting thing in life. Every day I think about how much I would have been able to do in life if I didnt have kids. All my money is gone and every day is a chore."

Millenial: "I don't think I want kids"


Ladies, imagine this. It’s 15 years from now, and you have no kids. You’re the cool wine aunt that occasionally comes back to the country for a brief visit before leaving for another exotic vacation. You have no commitments, and a suspicious amount of money.

Dogs are so much better!

When you agree that having youngsters is the worst factor ever and want to inform the world about it, you would possibly need to go to Childfree Etsy retailer. They’ve all types of merch there. Please observe that this website is reader-supported. Once you purchase via hyperlinks on our website, we might earn an affiliate fee. As an Etsy affiliate we earn from qualifying purchases.

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